Mother's Day

I usually have cereal for breakfast
But today
For a treat
I had a slice of burnt toast
The butter mixed with the black scrapings
Three lumps of marmalade
Embedded in the surface
Plus the half of the chocolate biscuit
Which didn't fall on the floor
I washed it down with a half & half mixture
Of cold tea and stewed milk
Accompanied by a rose
It tasted absolutely delicious



In Memoriam

My father taught me how to stand
In the shadow of an upright man
My father taught me how to walk
To take the pathways that I ought
My father taught me when to bend
And when to stop and call an end
My father taught me how to work
To strive and toil and never shirk
My father taught me how to laugh
To see in sad times something daft
To make me smile was his bequest
And this, of all he left, is best



Family Life

My daughter's gone on holiday
My son is with a friend
The sound of all this silence
May just drive me round the bend
So how then will I manage
When my birds at last have flown
Leaving I and my dear husband
Sitting pretty on our own?
When I talk about the stresses
Of a hectic family life
I had better just remember
It's a happy kind of strife



Last Exam

My daughter sits her last exam today
How pleased I am I really cannot say
Can't talk about the huge amount of stress
How glad I am that I can get some rest
For this is all a secret, keep I must
In case she thinks it shows a lack of trust
Although it is quite natural to worry
I must appear quite calm and cool, not flurried
Even if convinced that she has passed
Most of all I'm glad it's done at last



My Brother

My little brother is bigger than me
He grew up as broad and as tall as a tree
He lives in a house that is quite far away
He works in the night-time and sleeps in the day
There's only one feature about him that's bad
For years now I have never seen him - that's sad
This woman can never put family behind her
And the look of my son is a daily reminder
In the shape of his face and the things that he does
Young Simon's becoming a lot like my bruv



Happy Birthday, Mum!

My mother's not ancient my mother's not old
She will not act her age even though she's been told
That her feet up with knitting is what to expect
She never did treat all those the rules with respect
So she's internet friendly, she teaches, she learns
She has friends in all countries she visits in turns
So if you're depressed and start counting the years
Put aside all your worries, suspend all those fears
For the longer you live is more time to be glad
There is life still to live and much fun to be had



Dislocated

My daughter was in Truro having fun
Dancing in the club to number one
When her knee just did a sideways kind of flip
And left her feeling neither cool nor hip
Just lying in a heap upon the floor
With a dislocated knee which was so sore
She called us from an ambulance that night
When we heard from her we got a fright
Later on, her leg put in a cast
She asked us to collect her pretty fast
But the journey down to Truro was too far
So a friend took her to Plymouth in his car
While we drove there and back in just one day
Not quite what I'd hoped from my Sunday
Now she's safely home, I would say
It's best not to get plastered while away



Ealing Broadway

30 minutes, 30 feet
My daughter had arranged to meet
Her father, who would give a lift
To her friend also, as a gift
Eleven thirty, picked her up
When back at home they made a cup
Of tea
and sat in our front room
When very loud there came a boom
A bomb exploding in a car
Which had been parked not very far
From where my daughter had to wait
So lucky she did not leave late



World Cup 2002

My daughter travelled long to reach
One special spot upon the beach
One Sunday morning, there at eight
She had to be there, not be late
The reason for this, you must see
She had to stand and watch TV
Up there upon a giant screen
The most exciting match she'd seen
Copacabana was the place
And when Brazil had won the race
She partied on throughout the day
In Rio, where they love to play




Stir Crazy

Now I love my family dearly, please do not misunderstand
And the fun I have been having was as good as I had planned
But a few days after stopping work, the break I wanted so
Feels a little as though I have got no other place to go
For within these walls I've lived my life for over seven days
And with only three for company I'm starting to feel crazed
I would like to break on out of here and go a little wild
But instead now I am quarrelling, behaving like a child
It's as bad as being on holiday, a pleasure it is said
But without a jot of privacy I think I'll lose my head
Just a few days more, I can endure, I'm sure I will be fine
I'll just eat a few more chocolates and open up more wine



Eloise

For twenty-one years we have known you
Now you've grown to a woman so fine
With all of the things you've achieved in your life
I'm so proud to announce you are mine
You are beautiful, bright and courageous
With unquenchable humour and wit
Despite all the troubles you've been through
With hope your path forward is lit
So I hope that this morning the sunshine
Is the start of so many fine days
We all wish for your life to be happy
With luck and fun strewn on the way